


Since I Was Fourteen

by writewithlove



Category: Stray Kids (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Boys In Love, Flirting, Idiots in Love, Kissing, Love Confessions, M/M, but not good flirting, dear lord not good flirting, soft
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-17
Updated: 2020-06-17
Packaged: 2021-03-04 03:21:34
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,243
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24766879
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/writewithlove/pseuds/writewithlove
Summary: Jisung was fine keeping his feelings hidden, he’s been doing it since he was fourteen. He was fine! Living in constant pain, but fine!Then Seungmin started up a conversation...(Or: cliché hyunsung)
Relationships: Han Jisung | Han/Hwang Hyunjin
Comments: 8
Kudos: 228





	Since I Was Fourteen

**Author's Note:**

> Make sure you sign all the petitions you see!! 
> 
> Are you ready for the Stray Kids comeback?

It’s at Café Jeon where Seungmin fucks over Jisung’s life with just one question.

The two university students sat in front of each other, not really talking, both studying for an upcoming test. Now, Jisung wasn’t absorbing _any_ of the information, but he has to at least _pretend_ he was, Seungmin would hit him if not.

They’ve been like this for twenty minutes.

“Hyung?” Seungmin asks, looking over the rims of his glasses. 

The sudden question almost scares him.

Jisung takes a sip of his coffee. “Hmm?”

“Are you and Hyunjin hyung dating?”

Never in Jisung’s life has he ever spat up coffee so quickly. He draws attention from some other customers, and even Seungmin looks mildly concerned.

“Okay then,” he pushes up his glasses, “I’ll take that as a _no then.”_ Without a care in the world, Seungmin goes 

“No, no, no! What?” He’s a _tad_ bit frantic at the moment. “Why did you ask that?”

Seungmin looks around the café for a moment. “I… was just wondering? _Sorry?”_

_“Why were you wondering?”_

Seungmin rolls his eyes. “Cause you guys _act_ like you’re in a relationship!”

Did they?

They’ve been friends since… well… _forever,_ basically. Jisung’s earliest memory is finger painting with Hyunjin at age four. Sure they fought sometimes, but they always came out great on the other end. 

Jisung has also liked him since he was fourteen.

_Fourteen. Jesus Christ._

He can remember staring at the back of Hyunjin’s head in high school wishing to God that he would just get the courage to confess. He always said he’d do it the next day, and he’s been saying that for six years now.

“Do we?” Jisung asks before he realizes he even says anything, his voice is softer than it once was.

Seungmin blinks at him. 

“Hyunjin _literally_ had his arm around your waist all day!”

“We’ve always done that!”

Seungmin hits him on the head. “That’s my point! You guys act like a couple, you ever wonder why no one asks you out?”

There’s a beat of silence that falls between them.

Seungmin continues, “You guys really aren’t dating? Chan hyung was almost positive of it.”

Jisung rolls his eyes, his face going red. _“No._ We aren’t.”

“I— _wait, do you like Hyunjin hyung?”_

Jisung feels his ears start to burn. He wants to respond but his throat goes dry, he can almost _hear_ Seungmin’s smug grin. 

“You do! Why don’t you ask him out?”

“Keep your voice down!”

Seungmin laughs. “You’re an idiot.”

“I don’t like him…”

Seungmin nods. “No, I believe you. Definitely.”

Jisung stares at him for a long minute. “I hate you.”

Seungmin smirks. “Just tell him you like him, man. What’s the worst that’ll happen?”

“That’s _hyung_ to you, fucker.”

“Oh my,” he holds his hands in the air, “I’m so scared.”

Jisung looks back down at his textbook, and the mood grows sadder. “What if he doesn’t like me back?” He asks, hardly above a whisper. 

“I’m sure he does… I mean, whenever you’re not around he sulks like a puppy. It’s kind of depressing.”

Jisung can’t stop the smile that grows on his face. 

“Plus,” Seungmin adds, “he also _always_ sits next to you during movie nights. Even when Felix is sitting there just _waiting_ for cuddles.”

“He has Changbin.”

“Not the point, I’m pretty sure he likes you. Probably a lot more than just _likes,_ he probably wants to fuck you.”

Jisung chokes on his spit. _“You can’t just say that!”_

The younger shrugs. “Just did.”

—

Jisung is awake.

He’s awake and it _sucks._ It’s too dark in the room, the moon was hidden away by clouds, and his room is too quiet. He tosses and turns but can’t fall asleep, his mind was running a mile a minute. Same with his heart _—dear God is this what dying feels like?_

Jisung shakes his head. He curls himself into a ball, but then he suddenly remembers just how alone he feels in this room. Everything was too… _off._

Seungmin, _that fucker,_ it was his fault for making Jisung feel this way _._ Jisung was fine feeling like Hyunjin could never return his feelings, and sure he was dying slowly inside, but he was _managing._ He was managing _just fine._

He throws his pillow over his head and screams into it, every time he closes his eyes he sees Hyunjin’s face. 

It makes his heart skip a beat. 

Fuck he was so in love it was almost beginning to _hurt._ But he can’t stop himself from thinking about Hyunjin; his soft hugs, his wild and untamed hair, and his kind eyes. He could have anyone in the world.

He thinks back to just last week and how Hyunjin casually held his hand as they walked to classes, or how he ruffled Jisung’s hair when hanging out with Minho and Felix. Sure they may have _acted_ like a couple, but that didn’t mean anything, right? Not really at least. 

Jisung sits up, his hair falling into his face, he had just dyed it blue a few days ago. Hyunjin smiled so wide when Jisung walked out of the salon. 

If Hyunjin didn’t know about Jisung’s feelings, he would have to be blind. There was no way he didn’t at least have a _hint_ that Jisung liked him. 

It’s midnight now and Jisung just about hates the world. He’d kill to be with Hyunjin right now, even if that means Jisung would collapse on the spot from heart palpitations. 

That’s when his phone rings.

To say it scares the shit out of Jisung would be the biggest understatement of the _millennium._ He doesn’t even look at the caller ID before answering.

“Huh-Hello?” 

“Hey,” the person says back, they sound like they're smiling. 

_It’s Hyunjin._

_Of fucking course it’s Hyunjin._

“Hyung?” Jisung almost gasps. “Get to sleep! Wh—Are you okay?”

Hyunjin chuckles and Jisung almost combusts. “I can’t sleep,” he sounds smug, “you keep running through my mind, it’s tiring.”

Jisung’s heart stops beating all together for a moment and then goes into full hyperdrive. He feels his palms start to sweat. 

“Say something back,” Hyunjin whispers into the phone, and it’s almost like he’s right there with Jisung. “I miss your voice.”

Jisung swallows dryly, all the words he wants to say get caught in his throat. 

Jisung can almost hear Hyunjin’s smile. “Did I leave you breathless?”

That’s when Jisung’s face goes bright red. “What… what are you doing?”

“Nothing,” Hyunjin says coyly, “just talking to my favorite person ever.”

“Hyunjin,” Jisung says a little _too_ breathlessly, “seriously, what’s going on?”

There’s a beat of silence.

“I missed you,” he responds gently. “I missed you a lot.”

Jisung feels his heart pound in the tips of his fingers. However, he finds the strength to respond. “I—I missed you too.”

Hyunjin goes right back to his cocky exterior. “I know, Sungie.”

That name makes Jisung want to scream into his pillow like a middle schooler, honestly any name Hyunjin calls him makes him feel all young and hopeful. 

“I wanna see you.”

Jisung laughs. “It’s midnight— _almost one!”_

“And?”

“My mom would be very confused to find you here unannounced,” he can’t stop his smile. To save money for university both boys still lived with their parents.

“Please,” Hyunjin scoffs, “your mom loves me. Plus I’ve snuck into your house at later times. Remember when we watched _Frozen_ at three am?”

How can Jisung forget? That was the first night Jisung and Hyunjin ever cuddled together in bed, they were fifteen at the time and Jisung almost had a meltdown. 

Hyunjin continues, “Can I come over?”

“Yeah,” Jisung fiddles with the end of his shirt, “sure.”

He waits for him on his porch, the same porch they played on as kids. Once again, Jisung smiles. 

It’s cold out, which sucks because Jisung is in shorts and a loose hanging black shirt, but he’ll manage. Hopefully. Hyunjin only lives up the street from him. 

However, when Hyunjin _does_ finally show up, nothing could have prepared Jisung for just how… _amazing_ he would look. His hair is disheveled and he’s in pajama pants with a grey sweatshirt and in slippers. Jisung smiles on sight.

Hyunjin looks down at Jisung. “Are you not gonna at least _stand_ to greet me?”

Jisung looks down, his ears growing red, but he still complies. The two embrace, with Hyunjin’s arms resting just above Jisung’s waist. The hug goes longer than normal, but Jisung would never complain.

They only break away when Jisung lets out a violent shiver. Hyunjin immediately pulls away.

“Why aren’t you wearing a coat?!”

“Coats are for losers,” Jisung almost whines. 

Hyunjin doesn’t look too convinced, he goes to take off his sweatshirt and only stops when Jisung almost yells. 

“What are you doing?!”

Hyunjin narrows his eyes. “Keeping you warm.”

He slips it off and all but forces it onto Jisung. It isn’t too big on him, but it does reach a few inches past his hands. Never in his life has Jisung’s heart ever been this close to collapsing.

“Aren’t—Aren’t you gonna be cold?”

Hyunjin looks down for a moment, Jisung watches as he shrugs. “Nah, you warm my heart enough already.”

Jisung gains a little bit of confidence and lightly hits Hyunjin’s arm. “What’s with the pick-up lines? Practicing to ask someone out?”

Hyunjin sighs, but he’s grinning as he does so. “You know,” he looks Jisung in the eyes, “you shouldn’t tell your secrets to Seungmin.”

That’s when Jisung’s heart drops ten feet into his stomach. _That bastard,_ Jisung has half the mind to say. He takes a step away from Hyunjin, his throat clogged. 

“It’s okay,” Hyunjin whispers, _“I like you too, idiot.”_

Jisung can’t even process his words properly for what seems like hours. Not only that, Hyunjin really did leave him breathless, he’s left standing there, blinking at Hyunjin like a love struck fool. 

Hyunjin doesn’t seem to mind, he even laughs, biting his bottom lips. “You really didn’t know?”

Jisung rapidly shakes his head. 

Hyunjin takes Jisung’s hands into his own, and Jisung almost melts right there. Both of their hands are ice cold, but the way Hyunjin stares at them makes his face grow warm.

“How… how long?” Jisung asks, his voice shaking.

Hyunjin shrugs again, staring at their hands a little longer. “Since I was, like, seventeen maybe? You?” 

His voice was uncharacteristically quiet. 

Jisung chuckles in pure anxiety and shock. “Four… fourteen…?”

Hyunjin jerks his head up and stares at him wide-eyed. _“That long?!_ Seungmin told me you liked me for some time, but… _wow…”_

Jisung breaks out into a grin, Hyunjin copies that. “You were cute! What else was I supposed to do, _not_ like you?”

Hyunjin’s grin grew more genuine, and then he _kisses him._ He kisses Jisung like it’s the easiest thing in the world, hands intertwined. 

He pulls away after a second, staying close, their foreheads bump together. 

“Can we go in now? I’m getting cold.”

Jisung laughs like it’s the funniest thing he’s ever heard come out of Hyunjin. He hugs Hyunjin, nodding into his neck. 

Nothing was awkward, it was a little _too_ natural in bed, maybe they really did act like a couple a lot? For a long while they just talked about how oblivious they were in high school.

“I wanted to give you a valentine in school _so badly,”_ Hyunjin laughs. 

Jisung, still in the sweatshirt, shoots him a look. “Why didn’t you? I would have, like, _framed it!”_

Hyunjin throws his head back laughing. “I was _scared!_ My friend at the time, San, called me a loser…”

_“San even knew?!”_

“I wasn’t hiding my feelings for you that well! I think you’re just dense,” he giggles.

Jisung scoffs. “You couldn’t tell that I liked you!”

Hyunjin doesn’t respond, instead he leans over and kisses Jisung once again, this time much smoother than before. 

Jisung giggles into the kiss and allows Hyunjin to pull him in closer. He rests his hand on Hyunjin’s cheek.

The kiss is nice, _sweet_ almost. Even with Hyunjin’s hand on Jisung’s waist constantly pulling him in closer, Jisung still feels nothing but gold run through his body. 

Even when Hyunjin rolls over and Jisung is on top of him, the kiss is still nice. Jisung feels over the moon—over _mars_ even. 

Hyunjin’s hands roam Jisung’s back, he squeezes the smaller closer to his body. 

When they pull back, Hyunjin’s lips look bright red, Jisung can only imagine that his lips look the same. 

“Would it be too soon to say that I love you?”

Jisung laughs. “We’ve said that before though.”

“Yeah,” Hyunjin nods, “but now I _really_ love you.”

Jisung blushes, he rests his head on Hyunjin’s chest, covering the older with his body. “I love you too…”

Hyunjin hugs him so tight Jisung feels like he’s about to pop. 

“So… are we like… _dating_ now?” Jisung whispers.

“Nah,” Hyunjin jokes, “I’m actually unfriending you. Of course we are,” he kisses Jisung’s temple, “if you want.”

Jisung closes his eyes. “Of course…”

Hyunjin and Jisung reposition themselves so that Jisung’s back is pressed against Hyunjin’s chest, they’re holding hands.

“So Seungmin told you?”

Jisung feels Hyunjin nod in response. “He basically went,” he clears his throat, _“‘date him before I date him myself.’”_

The two laugh at that, everything was funny right now. 

God, Jisung was in love.


End file.
